Updating.

SOOO, I'm going to -insert name of town near where I live- high school next year instead of -insert name of high school I go to-. Why? I am sick of this bull crap. I'm sick of feeling like an outcast. I'm sick of the mental abuse.
To me, this seems like part way surrendering. Ok, I'm cool with that. I lose the battle, continue therapy, get better mentally, be happy, and win the war. This is about getting away from a small group of people who caused sooo much stress that I hurt myself. A small group of people I once called my friends.
But, someone I should've stayed friends with, but didn't told me making friends will be easy. Cest lavie, such is life. She told me you couldn't sugar-coat life and she didn't sugar-coat her responses. She talked with me about the pains that I had because of people she had only heard about. It was lovely.
So, I'm changing schools to be free. So before I stride through those doors, I'm changing my look. Well, my hair. Completely. Now, it's dark with a hint of red over it and pink bangs and streaks of blue and one or two of pink and it's down to my shoulder area except for my bangs that come down to almost my chin. When I change schools, I'm cutting the back of it real short. I'm bleaching it. Then, I'm dying it pink with blond streaks. Yep. That's my current plan.

I'm getting better...at hiding it.

For a while, I was actually trying to stop cutting. I was trying to let my body heal. Now, I care about as much as everyone else. None. Sure, Mom and Dad know I do/did, but I tell them when they ask that I haven't for a while. Honestly, it's not a big deal. The pain of the cuts make me forget bigger pains.
I'm just...so tired of how everything is. No one seems to care anymore. I feel...forgotten. Ah well, bedtime.